(inspired by James from Tamworth , and to be read with a bush drawl and a silly hat)
Each time I visit Bathurst I like to drive around the track
Cause I'm never really certain just how often I'll be back.
I scoot around Hell Corner, through the Esses, all those bits…
And imagine that I'm Brockie heading down into the pits.
But that's not the only motorsport that Bathurst has now is it?
Cause at Easter time I went there for a different kind of visit
No, speed was not the purpose for my journey up the hill
This time it was a slower and more dusty kind of thrill.
The four wheel drivers gathered at the campground at the top.
And for four whole days the action with their trucks just didn't stop!
There was lots of tough events to test their mettle to survive,
At this giant extravaganza known quite simply as J5.
And those that made it happen always knew it would occur,
It was two years in the planning, It was bigger than Ben Hur!
For the team that made it happen there were endless things to do,
And at times they felt they'd bitten off way more than they could chew!
So, what exactly is it, this thing called Jamboree?
And what's supposed to happen? And what's it meant to be?
If you've never ever been to one, you don't know what you're missin',
That's regardless of your choice of truck; Toyota , Zook or Nissan.
It doesn't really matter what you've chosen as your car,
What you do is meet with others who have come from near and far
To share the four-wheel driving life, the sorrows and the glories,
And to bullshit round the campfire with exaggerated stories.
And of course there's lots of things to do on each and every day
Whether kid, adult, (or bit of both) there were lots of ways to play.
You could drive the Rocky Horror, over rocks and slippery logs,
Or get teamed up in the Mud Run to go paddling through the bogs.
The Hill Climb too, had wombat holes to test out your suspension
And the mystery of the classing, it just helped to build the tension.
It was meant to work you harder with your spring lifts and your lockers
And to level out the playing field for those that just drove stockers.
If competing in the logs and mud was not your cup of tea,
There were lots of other things to try, things to do and see.
If slightly more light-hearted fun is your offroad Nirvana,
Then you'd probably have a ball as you raced round in the Funkhana.
Or maybe you'd prefer a more cerebral sort of bash?
Then fire up the GPS and find a Geocache
I hope you get the point that there was plenty to keep you busy
If you tried to do it all you'd end up dazed, confused and dizzy!
In the afternoons you'd form your teams and then get cracking
To toss an egg, or cram a Zook or prove your talent was lacking
You could get on stage and be a goose or just act like a zombie,
But those that did it helped their club to visit Binacrombi
And speaking of the cram, it was a highlight of the contest
Though the Zook club and Blue Mountains squeezed in more than all the rest
Of the seventeen folk that crammed, some were strangers to begin
But they knew each other better coming out than going in!
Three day trips left the site each day to please the eager trippers,
And though I never got to go, I'm sure that they were rippers.
Cause 4WDing in the Bathurst region's always grand,
But sometimes there was work to do, and gates that should be manned.
We chose to go for catered meals back at the time we booked,
It was really good to know each day that all your meals were cooked.
Just roll up to the smorgasbord and start to fill your plate
I wish we could have that at home, that'd be bloody great!
And on the final night we had the prizes and the speeches,
Where we recapped on the whole event, the highlights and the features.
And when that bit was over then we partied with the Horn Stars
Though if Sheena really showed her tits they could have passed for Porn Stars.
So if you never got there cause you had to take a dive,
Well that's about as much as I can tell you of J5
If you're into 4 wheel driving it was pretty close to heaven.
And maybe in just two more years we'll see you at J7!
Chris Betcher
Each time I visit Bathurst I like to drive around the track
Cause I'm never really certain just how often I'll be back.
I scoot around Hell Corner, through the Esses, all those bits…
And imagine that I'm Brockie heading down into the pits.
But that's not the only motorsport that Bathurst has now is it?
Cause at Easter time I went there for a different kind of visit
No, speed was not the purpose for my journey up the hill
This time it was a slower and more dusty kind of thrill.
The four wheel drivers gathered at the campground at the top.
And for four whole days the action with their trucks just didn't stop!
There was lots of tough events to test their mettle to survive,
At this giant extravaganza known quite simply as J5.
And those that made it happen always knew it would occur,
It was two years in the planning, It was bigger than Ben Hur!
For the team that made it happen there were endless things to do,
And at times they felt they'd bitten off way more than they could chew!
So, what exactly is it, this thing called Jamboree?
And what's supposed to happen? And what's it meant to be?
If you've never ever been to one, you don't know what you're missin',
That's regardless of your choice of truck; Toyota , Zook or Nissan.
It doesn't really matter what you've chosen as your car,
What you do is meet with others who have come from near and far
To share the four-wheel driving life, the sorrows and the glories,
And to bullshit round the campfire with exaggerated stories.
And of course there's lots of things to do on each and every day
Whether kid, adult, (or bit of both) there were lots of ways to play.
You could drive the Rocky Horror, over rocks and slippery logs,
Or get teamed up in the Mud Run to go paddling through the bogs.
The Hill Climb too, had wombat holes to test out your suspension
And the mystery of the classing, it just helped to build the tension.
It was meant to work you harder with your spring lifts and your lockers
And to level out the playing field for those that just drove stockers.
If competing in the logs and mud was not your cup of tea,
There were lots of other things to try, things to do and see.
If slightly more light-hearted fun is your offroad Nirvana,
Then you'd probably have a ball as you raced round in the Funkhana.
Or maybe you'd prefer a more cerebral sort of bash?
Then fire up the GPS and find a Geocache
I hope you get the point that there was plenty to keep you busy
If you tried to do it all you'd end up dazed, confused and dizzy!
In the afternoons you'd form your teams and then get cracking
To toss an egg, or cram a Zook or prove your talent was lacking
You could get on stage and be a goose or just act like a zombie,
But those that did it helped their club to visit Binacrombi
And speaking of the cram, it was a highlight of the contest
Though the Zook club and Blue Mountains squeezed in more than all the rest
Of the seventeen folk that crammed, some were strangers to begin
But they knew each other better coming out than going in!
Three day trips left the site each day to please the eager trippers,
And though I never got to go, I'm sure that they were rippers.
Cause 4WDing in the Bathurst region's always grand,
But sometimes there was work to do, and gates that should be manned.
We chose to go for catered meals back at the time we booked,
It was really good to know each day that all your meals were cooked.
Just roll up to the smorgasbord and start to fill your plate
I wish we could have that at home, that'd be bloody great!
And on the final night we had the prizes and the speeches,
Where we recapped on the whole event, the highlights and the features.
And when that bit was over then we partied with the Horn Stars
Though if Sheena really showed her tits they could have passed for Porn Stars.
So if you never got there cause you had to take a dive,
Well that's about as much as I can tell you of J5
If you're into 4 wheel driving it was pretty close to heaven.
And maybe in just two more years we'll see you at J7!
Chris Betcher
